I survived

I finished the half marathon. Faster than I thought I would actually. I finished in 3:36, which is super awesome for me. I had a running buddy that helped keep me going. I jogged more than I anticipated. I only thought I was going to die a few times, but kicked myself in the arse and kept going.

It was a great day. I was super sore for about four days after, but it was worth it, Just to know I finished. And I WASN"T last!!! I was 6th in my age group. There weren't very many in my group, but still.

Till next time.

sharing time

just a quicky..

sharing my new baby!
2011 Chevy Equinox.
the newest car I've ever had.
and we got the best deal ever!

I haven't really had time to get to the gym, with school and work and all..
but I am signing up to do a RAGNAR in June!! with my daughter eeee!! I'm soooo frekin excited!!

so I have to get running.. like now!
no excuses.. It's a long relay. no sleep, lots of running, lots of fun!

teensy tiny change

Like .4 down.
eh
whatevs

It's been a stressful week.. that's why I haven't posted.
excuses, I know

but we just found out our company got sold to a huge company for a shit-ton of money. like over a billion dollars.
what?

so I may or may not have a job in a month or two.

Halloween didn't help.
we did not get one single trick or treator.
not one.
I was sad.
so sad.

we're seriously broke due to being scrambling to pay off the last of the bills to get qualified for our home.

my sis lives on Long Island. she still has no power. but her kids are safe and warm with the inlaws
she is doing pretty good. kept me updated so I didn't worry too much bout her.


stress?
pfft

what are ya gonna do?

I haven't really thought about the challenge, I apologize for that.

this week?

hmm..

I think I need to be more mindful about what I am putting in my mouth.
Halloween candy made me sick
treats made me sick
I need to stop making myself sick

I need to get back on my plan of no less processed food.
I truly feel better when I am not eating "fake" food.

I need to remember that!
every day.
every meal
every snack

I am going to make myself some lil reminders. on my phone, on my fridge, sticky notes.. you know. just so I don't forget I don't like feeling like poo.

so.
try to think about what you are actually eating.
is it going to make you feel good or bad?
is it going to fuel your body or just make your brain happy for a second?

Happy November!

UNCHANGED. AGAIN.

ok. seriously.
I know I'm not trying all that hard.
but no change?
at all?
pfft!
yes.
it is better than gaining.
but I need to LOSE weight. not keep it.
can someone just take it for me?
please?

pretty please?

fine.

this week.
I will focus on losing weight.
I haven't been all that focused on myself lately.
with buying the house. and getting ready for Halloween. and basketball games. and work.
my hair is falling out.
for reals.

I need to find myself again.
like inside.
and out.
cuz there's only one me.


so the challenge this week

make a conscious effort to control what you want your outcome to be.
whether it is to lose, maintain, eat better, exercise more.. etc..
pick one or two things to make a huge effort to work on.
and.
do it (them)

that's it.
easy peasy?

if it were.. we'd all be supermodels.

wanna see my soon to be kitchen?

 isn't it preeeetyyy?? :)
and just for fun.. the tree they included for us. cute huh?

No changes

I am sorry I haven't updated the challenge for the week..
I was so sick Friday I called in sick to work. I know. never happens.

just dizzy and nauseated all day.
it started Thursday night during a screening of Paranormal Activity 4 we got tickets too. maybe it was the butter on the popcorn. idk.

either way. I felt crappy.

but I had no changes in my weight. I guess that's good. no gains!

I got my Bountiful Baskets.. oooooh it had yummy stuff!!

lots of squashes.. I'm not exactly sure what to do with them. I've only ever had spaghetti squash..
what to do, what to do?

I know what to do with the pumpkins.. but the rest? no clue

I got kale.. pomegranates, pineapple, bananas, grapes, celery, tomatoes, some pear apple things.. and that big squashy thing back there.. lol

mmmm lots of smoothie goodies!

it was a great weekend..

we went with the drill team to see Thriller by local Odyssey Dance Theater.. it was awesome!

 my girls are the two on the right.. the youngest had to be in the pic lol

me n the hubs got to be in a pic for a change (left and right)

 the girls.. and a couple moms :)

we had a great time!

I wish I could have taken pics at the theater.. it was rockin with zomibes n monsters.. sooo cool!

we did get one pic with a zomb.. right before we went in.. it's a crappy pic lol

my breakfast today.. a smoothie :)

protein powder, banana, pineapple and half a pear. water and ice.. mmmmmm so good!

it's gone already lol

the skull cup behind it has a homemade coffee drink I made.. coffee, coconut milk and chocolate syrup. yumo!

enough with show n tell..

how is the challenge going for you??

I have been thinking of adding something new for this week..

we have: getting looooots of water, no snacking, unless it's fruit or veggies.. and now I think I need to add

dunn dunnn dunnnn

exercise!

that I already do pretty well..

but it has a twist.. of course!

do something you have never done.. or haven't done in a very long time.

try something new!

at least once this week

I may have a prize ready to go out to the best new exercise adventure!!

have fun and good luck!

I feel like a loser

and not in a good way
I've gained
I'm not saying how much. because I actually don't know.

I'm avoiding the scale.
like the plague.
seriously.

I can't even bring myself to turn it on.

I suck

I need to pull my head outta my arse

I know I said before I was going to do better.
well
I lied
to you
to myself
to my family

I am a failure

I have no excuses

none

I've ate crap
every day
I hate it
totally hate it
it really does taste like crap
I feel guilty for even eating it
but I continue to do so
why?

no clue!

just habit I suppose
and lazyness
I would love to blame my family
but I am the one doing the shopping

I am the one putting the shit in my own mouth

*sigh*

I feel fat
I feel like shit
I feel like a failure

I am going to slowly get back on track.
yep.
I said slowly
I can't expect myself to turn around overnight.
I didn't fall off my plan overnight.
it took a few days


life happens
I will deal
but I had to let you all know how much I suck
I am only hurting myself, I know, but I feel like I let you down too.
and that sucks big time!


but on a happy note..

me n the hubs celebrated our 16 year anniversary

yeah
I
know
16 years

 yeah
I am actually wearing a dress.. I had to go buy one because our date was to dress up and go out. it was a blast. we went to see Hotel Transylvania. yep. a cartoon. it rocked!

 he luvs me!

and our baby girl. her homecoming dress. isn't she darling?
yeah. I love to brag bout her.

we got dirrrrty!

Before all the fun

 me n my kids..
the hubs had to work.. :(

after..
we were disgusting! it was sooo much fun... five miles of mud, running, climbing, falling, laughing and more mud!
we crawled through tubes, climbed up rope walls, swam through mud pits, fell alot, jumped through tires, launched ourselves over muddy pipes, etc..  we conquered our fears. I actually made it up the tall walls of scary! like twenty feet in the air and back down with nothing but wood,  ropes and mud.. eee!

 my shirt was white.. I've washed it, bleached it three times.. and it's still brown.. so yeah.. next year.. don't wear white!

Lacey got to do the piglet plunge.. a mile for the little ones.. she had fun!

every muscle in my body aches. I can tell we worked hard. played hard. giggled hard.
I can't wait till the next one!!

Mindful eating

home sick one day last week.. me n the kidling were watching Dr Oz.. I heart this man, I tell ya!

he had Goldie Hawn on and she was amazing! a lil fishlippy.. but amazing all the same..

her new thing is "10 mindful minutes" feeling younger and such..

she had Dr Oz put a jelly bean in his mouth.. eyes closed and hold it..
feel it, taste it, savor it..
it was a great thing to watch..
someone experiencing their food.

I thought.. I need to do that
so.. I made my lil lunch of cottage cheese, fruit n chia seeds.. and it took me 45 minutes to eat the bowl.
it wasn't a big bowl either.
I TASTED every bite.
I SAVORED the berries.
I EXPERIENCED the chia

it rocked.

My new thing will be "to be mindful of my food" everything I put in my mouth. I need to ask.. Why am I eating this? Is it to fill a void? Is it to nourish my body? Is it to fuel a workout? Is it just to put something in my mouth because I'm bored, tired, filling the habit?? etc..

I need to pay attention to what I am putting in my body, so I can get the most out of my body! I want to be healthy and happy. Food is the best place to start!

I've been tagged!

From  cuteypie Diandra @ The shrinking spell
Rules:
1. post these rules.
2. you must post 11 random things about yourself.
3. answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post.
4. create 11 new questions for the people you tag to answer.
5. go to their blog and tell them that you've tagged them.
6. no stuff in the tagging section about ‘you are tagged if you are reading this.’ blah blah blah, you legitimately have to tag 11 people!

Random things about me:
1. I love pink and glitter. both at the same time preferably.
2. I tried writing erotica. I gave up. I may try again.
3. I've lost almost 60 pounds!
4. I have Ankylosing spondylitis and I was told I couldn't run. Well. I am! alot! and I feel great!!
5. I have a "witchy box" filled with spells, herbs, charms..etc sitting on my craft table :)
6. I love to "stalk" blogs. I love reading about others' lives and learning new ideas. I don't always comment or reply to comments, but I do read them!
7. I'm addicted to yoga. I love it! I go twice a week now, but hope to get more in!
8. I think my hubs is the sexiest person I know. I love his confidence, his personality (most times), he is a great father.
9. I hoard books. I don't always read them. In fact I have many, many, books that I haven't even opened. I just had to buy them.
10. I am addicted to diet soda. I need to change this. asap.
11. I have a.d.d. which, if you've read any of my blogs.. yep. I have three.. you will notice.. I don't follow through with things well. lol.

I answered:
My 11 random questions for you:
1. What was you favorite stuffed toy as a kid? Do you still have it? probably something do to with smurfs.. I really don't remember..
2. Which one do you prefer - typing or writing on paper? typing. I have horrible handwriting
3. Do you follow the news? What was the most recent piece that stuck with you? not really. I always miss it. the most recent was about six local police officers that got shot serving a warrant. One passed away. it was all pretty sad.
4. What was your biggest cooking/baking disaster? um. all of them? J/k. I don't really try hard things.. so not much to mess up :)
5. Which is your favorite animal and why? horses. They are so magical and majestic. I have always loved them.
6. Do you like shopping? Why (not)? YES! and no. I wish I had more money for it!
7. Which person in your family is closest to your heart? My youngest daughter. She is most like me and has the biggest heart.
8. Are you a cat person or a dog person? Or do you prefer any other pet? both. I have both and a bunny.
9. Is there a crime you would commit if you thought you'd get away with it? hmm.. rob a bank maybe.
10. High heels or boots? Why? high heeled boots! lol. they make your legs look longer and sexy
11. What do you keep on your desk?  my diet dr pepper.. some fruit. my radio and tons of vitamins. oh and pics of my kidlings


mkay.. here are your questions..

1. if you could meet anyone, living or passed, who would it be
2. and why to #1 (see how I got two outta that one?)
3. workouts at gym or at home?
4. what is your goal for the new year
5. favorite color
6. ever had your fortune, tarot, or aura read?
7. if you could buy any kind of car, truck,suv.. which one would it be?
8. what is the first thing that made you smile today?
9. how often do you shave your legs?
10. do you color your hair? and if so.. what's your natural color?
11. what are you thinking about right now?

so.. I'm off to tag!

life get's in the way?

why do people say that?
how can 'life" get in the way?
of?
life?
really?

is that just an excuse for not doing what we tell ourselves we need to be doing?

I think so.

I am the princess of excuses.

I'm in pain.
My back is killing me.
My body is achey.
My head hurts.
I can't walk very far..

those were alllll excused I've used in the past.
up until
about a year and a half ago..

then.. I woke up
who says I can't make better choices for myself?
why can't I get on that treadmill and do what I CAN?
why was I letting "life" get in my way of happiness?

I was lazy.
I was truly in pain. every day. still am. Just not to the extent as before.
but I learned to cope
and deal

and live.
life.

I am "life"
no more letting myself get in my own way.

tomorrow is the hubster's n mine 15 year anniversary.
are we going to go to dinner?
yep.
am I going to eat pasta?
probably
am I going to let myself feel guilty about enjoying "life" for one night
nope.
I am going to give myself over to the experience and the company
I don't have to eat the whole plate or the entire basket of bread.
I can still be "good"
and I will be.
but I am not going to cheat myself out of a special night just because I am afraid of what the scale might say about it.
I am allowing myself to be "normal" and that's ok.

I don't have to deprive myself from anything.
Everything in moderation is perfect. The perfect way to live.
I have lost almost 60 pounds by living this way.
I am going to love myself and enjoy myself.
I will be just fine :)

Little black skirt challenge

I know.. It's really called The Christmas dress challenge.. but yanno..
I tried on the "little black skirt" and it really isn't as "little" as I thought..
but it is a black skirt..it is slinky and stretchy..
which means..
"shows everything being squished inside"

so..
my goals for the next 12 weeks..

1. Follow my Weight watchers plan.. that's a no brainer. You'd think.. I can't seem to follow it..
2. get my tracking in. every day!
3. exercise. (this ones easy)
4. water water water
5. make sure I'm getting enough protein. Being Vegetarian and running.. I need lotsa protein. Kinda hard to do for me.
6. This is going to be my big one. NO MORE EXCUSES!

mkay. so here's my weight for the start of this challenge.
I am soo disgusted with myself. I gained 5 frekin pounds last week.
I had every excuse in the book.
I injured myself..(which I did)
I ate poorly (no reason other than I got lazy)
I couldn't exercise as much as I used to..
blah blah..
so..
no
more
excuses.

my starting weight is ...
....


.......

162

ugh.
I know.

I was 157 the week before.
sick huh?

I will look back at this post in December.. and say..

oooh. I DID lose alot of weight..
lol.

today's plan

I am a wee bit sore from my 5k last night.. but I totally rocked it!
the hubs and the kidlets came to support me..and that meant everything!
I finished first.. can you believe it?
I know it wasn't a race, but it was the best feeling evah to be first at something!
I jogged most of the time.. and slowed to catch my breath a few times.. but didn't stop.. once!

I finished in 36 minutes.. seriously!

so.. today's plan..

a bowl of the new Fiber one 80 calorie cereal.. which is sooooo yummy btw.. 4 p+ with milk
a lean cuisine pizza.. the one with tomatoes.. soooo good.. 8p+
some celery with ff cream cheese 2p+
and something nummy for dinner..maybe grill some veggies
then hit the gym tonight.. I missed the stairmaster last night.. due to me forgetting that I signed up for a 5k.. but it was good.

Have a great day!

a Late Award

Thanks to Lisa.. (sorry.. I've been a bit behind on things)
I'm finally able to post this award she gave me!
yay! I love prizes!!!

The rules are as follows;
Thank the blogger who gave the award to you,
Tell 7 things about yourself
Pass the award on (to 15 people)


Thanks Lisa!! her blog
1. I am deathly afraid of spiders.. Like.. I can't even be in the same room..freakishly, spazing out kinda afraid of em..
*shivers just thinking about the creepy crawly buggers*
2. I am addicted to exercise. and damn proud of it. being told I can't for years.. finally got old.. so I did.. and I do exercise most days of the week. sometimes twice :)
3. I love to craft. I make things. and have even been published in an online scrapbook magazine :) you can check out my craft blog here, only if ya want ta
4. I would give anything to be able to dance again. Just because I loved it so much in high school. But there aren't many classes around for overweight, 30 sumthing, mommies..
5. seven? really?
mkay.. I'm a writer. kinda. I'm trying anyways..
6. I love my girls with every cell in my body. I would do anything for the little shits. but I guess any mom would say that..
7. my fav color is pink. of course. but I also have a dark, twisted side. skulls, black.. glitter.. I'm well rounded that way.

Idk if I know 15 peeps..
but here goes..
Kirsten cuz she's my evil bewbie twin or sumpin. and she just rocks
jack he totally rocks
lil miss hippo  well.. cuz I can totally see a hippo wearing a headband
mizfit kinda needs no explanation.. she is amazing
pior fat girl can I count this as my last 11 peeps?

k I'm done..
thanks bloggers! you rock!

um. YUM! and 16 weeks on Weight Watchers

I pick this up while shopping..

and

all I can say is..

mmmmmmm

chocolate..

in cereal?

yes!

add some skim milk,  a grapefruit.. and yummy 4 pp's bkfast :)

taa-daa

aaaand!!

I got a prize..

it really doesn't take much to amuse me.

the whole a d d and all..

shiny stuff

pink stuff

cute stuff

so..

this isn't pink (I sooo wish it was)

but I got the "stay and succeed charm" for my 16 weeks of sticking to the Weight Watchers plan

see?

 

now.. I just have to get that damn keyring thinabajig to put it on!

 

I will get a 5k charm in a couple weeks to go with it too!! yay me!!

 

see?

 

doesn't take much :)

just sharin

My 7 pp bkfast..
an english muffin
a hard boiled egg (not quite the whole thing, it didn't all fit, but I counted it anyways)
a laughing cow cheese wedge
and a bit of lean ham
mmmm

my nummy water and all my vitamins for the day.. (those don't include my scrips) bah!
goooood morning!!!

wanna see sumpin funny?

k.. so I had to get a new swimsuit.. if you remember the post here with last year's suit.. that somehow grew two sizes too big..

so. I am cheap. and I know this may gross some out.. but we went thrift store shopping.. not looking for suits.. but found a whole rack.. for $5 each..
me and my girls all got one. :)
and the one I got fits. really..
and it's kinda cute.
and it was five bucks.
I washed it of course.. twice..

but hell.. I'm broke. I'll do what I can.

wanna see?
if you're squeamish.. don't scroll..


.....
........

..............
.......................
............................

.......................................
..............
.....................................
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it has a skirt!
hids the saddlebags kinda well. me thinks..

so..

I decided I won't be able to do the triathlon that I wanted to.. I guess you need a bike..
but I will keep doing the workouts.. I kinda like em..

Just sharing my entries from last week

This is prolly why I gained.. see all the bad food?? oh and no activities!! BAH!

PointsPlus™ Tracker entries




Saturday, January 29, 2011

Morning
1  small Restaurant-style unsweetened fruit cup	0
2  slice(s) toasted wheat bread	4
1  small potato, baked	2
1  Omelettes for Two	3
Subtotal	9
Midday
1  item(s) fast-food cheeseburger, small	8
Subtotal	8
Evening
Salsa with Tortilla Chips and Celery	1
Subtotal	1
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	18
Food PointsPlus values remaining	11
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
1  item(s) Fast-Food Biscuit with Cheese, Bacon, and Egg	12
Subtotal	12
Midday
2  cup(s) tossed salad without dressing	0
2  Tbsp Ranch Dressing	3
Subtotal	3
Evening
1  slice(s) store-bought cake with icing	9
Subtotal	9
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	24
Food PointsPlus values remaining	5
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
1  Tbsp whipped cream cheese	1
1  item(s) Breakfast Wheat Bagel	6
1  small Restaurant-style unsweetened fruit cup	0
Subtotal	7
Midday
1  serving(s) cafe rio salad with grilled chicken	14
Subtotal	14
Evening
4  piece(s) Crispy Chicken Nuggets Kids' Meal, Chicken Nuggets	5
1  serving(s) French Fries French Fries	6
Subtotal	11
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	32
Food PointsPlus values remaining	0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
1  cup(s) Fiber one raisin bran	5
Subtotal	5
Midday
1  item(s) Smart Ones Lasagna Florentine	7
1  medium baby carrots	0
31  piece(s) Chili Cheese Corn Chips	4
Subtotal	11
Evening
Taco soup - Quick added food	5
Subtotal	5
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	21
Food PointsPlus values remaining	8
Activity
30 min elliptical trainer, moderate intensity	2
Activity PointsPlus values earned	2
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
1/2 cup(s) 2% reduced fat milk	2
1  cup(s) Fiber one raisin bran	5
Subtotal	7
Midday
Taco soup - Quick added food	5
1  small apple(s)	0
1  cup(s) celery	0
1  wedge(s) Light Creamy Garlic & Herb	1
Subtotal	6
Evening
2  item(s) fast-food cheeseburger, small	16
20  item(s) french fries	11
Subtotal	27
Anytime
1  item(s) Burritos Chicken Casita Burrito	12
Subtotal	12
Food PointsPlus values total used	52
Food PointsPlus values remaining	0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
16  cracker(s) Wheat Thins Reduced fat baked snack crackers	3
1  wedge(s) Light Creamy Garlic & Herb	1
1  large banana(s)	0
Subtotal	4
Midday
Taco soup - Quick added food	5
1  item(s) salad, grilled chicken, without dressIng, fast food	5
1  Tbsp lite honey mustard dressing	9
Subtotal	19
Evening
1  item(s) 6" whole wheat low carb	1
1/4 cup(s) shredded fat-free cheddar cheese	1
1/8 cup(s) roasted chicken breast	1
Subtotal	3
Anytime
1  item(s) Sugar Free Low Calorie Gelatin Snacks Sugar-Free Low Calorie Strawberry Gelatin	0
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	26
Food PointsPlus values remaining	3
Activity
15 min elliptical trainer, moderate intensity	1
10 min Walking (>3.0 mph [20 min mile] and <5.0 mph [12 min mile] on level surface)	1
Activity PointsPlus values earned	2
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

Notes

Morning
1  cup(s) Fiber one raisin bran	5
1/2 cup(s) 2% reduced fat milk	2
Subtotal	7
Midday
1  slice(s) bread	2
1  slice(s) deli-sliced turkey	0
1/2 item(s) Dill pickles	0
1  serving(s) French Fries	6
Subtotal	8
Evening
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal	0
Food PointsPlus values total used	15
Food PointsPlus values remaining	14
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids          Milk & Milk Products     Fruit & vegetables          Multivitamin/Mineral   Healthy Oil     Activity

This week is already sooo much better!!